When I drove out that morning, I was going on vacation to visit a friend in Texas. I was in my mid-twenties and had just extricated myself from a painfully unhappy relationship. I wanted to get far away to recalibrate and regain my perspective. Out of state: perfect.
By the time I got back from my road trip a couple of weeks later, something foundational had shifted in my heart and I had embraced the idea that happiness lay elsewhere. Continue reading I Never Meant to Leave Florida
Here’s a concept simple enough I think I might just be able to pull it off.
Have you heard of the One Word 365 “resolution revolution”? Instead of making a list of New Year’s resolutions that you won’t remember by this time next month and surely won’t have kept by this time next year, growing numbers of people are choosing to focus on just one word for the entire year.
The idea, from the One Word website, is that you choose:
“One word that sums up who you want to be or how you want to live. One word that you can focus on every day, all year long.”
And here’s what could happen: Continue reading How I think “one word” could improve the soundtrack of my year
What do I mean by a mood sponge? I doubt you’ll find the term in any psychology textbook per se, though you may recognize it for reasons of your own. It’s a description I base on personal observations and life experience.
Mood sponges are people who tend to take their emotional cues from others, whether as a defensive tactic or a learned behavior. They measure their responses and reactions by those around them and sadly, absorb way more than their share of the negative.
I think there are reasons someone becomes a mood sponge and it’s not because they are lazy or uninspired. Maybe they’re trying to keep the peace. Or protect themselves. Or just make their lives work.
Here are some examples (names changed): Continue reading Because the Holidays Are Risky for a “Mood Sponge”
If you were to visit my neighborhood tonight, you wouldn’t have to go far before being confronted by more than one of those front yard animatronic Santas that repeatedly drop their drawers to reveal “Happy Holidays” written in script on their rears. Down the block, there’s a rifle-toting Frosty the Snowman in camouflage gear, while SpongeBob grins weirdly at baby Jesus in the blow-up manger scene close by. I live in the Midwest, but I’m sure that wherever you are, the scene is similar.
It’s all very confusing.
Christmas has come to represent over-the-top materialism, endless parties, spiked eggnog, and that ubiquitous loop of holiday songs in the background everywhere – even at the gas station. It seems obvious: Christmas has been turned into a mostly secular holiday.
But before you go getting all nervous that I am about to launch into a rant about how NOT to observe Christmas, let me assure you I have exactly the opposite intent. Here’s my suggestion for a more meaningful season: Continue reading Why It’s Time to Rethink Christmas
Despite our best efforts (or maybe because we often withhold our best efforts), we are forced to continually bob and weave, reposition, and adjust in this life. Even if all our own choices were wise (unlikely), we would still be operating in the company of other flawed humans. We all lead workaround lives.
But have you ever stopped to think about who led the ultimate workaround life? Continue reading And I Thought MY Life Was a Workaround
“Nothing, not even your dream coming true, is perfect.”
Before I went into law enforcement I lived in the world of advertising and public relations for almost a decade. All these years later, I am still drawn to a compelling headline or an irresistible book title. When good content follows, I’m affirmed and happy. (I still believe words have a power that even a badge and a gun can’t touch.)
That said, how co
uld I resist a title like “How to Use a Runaway Truck Ramp”? I was hooked immediately.
I already knew Shawn Smucker’s writing from reading his blog and following him on Twitter. I knew he was accessible, funny, and wise, committed to his family and his faith. And here was a bonus: this book promised to introduce me to his wife, Maile, also a writer and deep thinker. I couldn’t wait to go along on his family’s cross-country journey.
Seriously, you ask, did they really take their four small children (ages 2, 3, 7 and 8 ) on a four-month long bus trip across the US and back again in a big old lumbering bus they named Willie?
Yes, and they survived with some great stories and more than a few surprising lessons. Both Shawn and Maile journaled throughout the experience so no detail was missed in the retelling. The result is a sometimes white-knuckling, often hilarious, completely relate-able story, not just of their journey, but of their transformation.
The writing is engaging:
“The road there is like a sliver of thread dropped amongst rocks, and it winds along the path of least resistance.”
Thought-provoking:
“But what if my ‘today’ must die in order for such prolific life to rise? What if the destruction of this current beauty must take place so that the root of something even more glorious can push up new shoots through the darkness?”
Honest:
“I wonder if maybe I didn’t fill my real life with enough gusto to make it worth staying in.”
Challenging:
“That’s the thing about adventures. The stuff that happens isn’t always easy. It’s not always fun. But it’s always worth telling.”
And inspiring:
“Adventures will change you. They’ll saturate you with a fresh view of life. They’ll take every foundation you ever stood on and shake them until they crack. Adventures will tear away layer after layer of you, and in the end, when it’s all over, you’ll step away from that pile of old skins and barely recognize the person you have become.”
How to Use A Runaway Truck Ramp: A great title that delivers fabulous content. (Can you tell I’m affirmed and happy?)
Click here for a sample of Shawn’s writing and then get a copy of the book here: http://shawnsmucker.com/store/
Shawn Smucker is the author of How to Use a Runaway Truck Ramp and Building a Life Out of Words. He lives in Lancaster County, PA with his wife Maile and their four children. You can find him on Twitter and Facebook, and he blogs (almost) daily at shawnsmucker.com Maile blogs at mailesmucker.blogspot.com
Last weekend we celebrated my Dad’s 90th birthday with a big bash: sit-down dinner, fancy centerpieces, a proclamation by the Mayor (yes, really!), and a video retrospective of his life – the whole shot. He had personally made a list of people he wanted there, and the invitations went out well in advance. We made plans based on all those who said they were coming. Some had to change their plans at the last minute due to hospitalizations and unexpected obligations. That’s understandable.
But to those who said to him in the days that followed, “We got busy that day and just forgot”, I say, “Excuse me??” That may fly if you’re talking about taking out the trash or getting the oil changed in your car. But don’t disrespect my Dad – the coolest guy on the planet – by saying you “forgot”. He specifically wanted you there and you couldn’t write it on your calendar? Not acceptable.
(And to those who never responded one way or the other to his invitation, don’t even get me started…)
That experience got me thinking . . . Here are a few more excuses that don’t cut it with me: Continue reading Excuses That Don’t Cut It With Me
I love donkeys. And come on, elephants are just plain cool!
Can we just leave it at that? Can we stop there before you write me off because of my political leanings or I get upset with you for yours? In spite of all the naysayers and Chicken Littles in the media, I don’t really think we’re looking at the end of life as we know it as a result of the 2012 election (or any other election). But it’s okay; if you insist on continuing to needle me, go ahead. I doubt I’ll be dissolving into tears over it. Continue reading You Can Mock Me About These Things and I Won’t Cry (Really)
Confession time. Lately I’ve realized there are a number of things in my life that really aren’t up to me. I may have a role to play in them or I may wish I had more influence over them, but the end result is actually out of my hands. Frankly, if I’m to be truthful, this is kind of a relief.
Here are ten, in no particular order.
It’s not my job:
1. To bring others around to my way of thinking – I am entitled to my opinion and have a responsibility to form these opinions based on truth and prayerful consideration. But ultimately it’s not up to me to decide for someone else or attempt to convince them of a different point of view, however well-intentioned I may think I am. Continue reading Ten Things That Aren’t My Job
Maybe it all depends on how you define home.
The high school I graduated from in North Miami, Florida, has been torn down and the areas around the original site are now a blight. The old neighborhoods are unrecognizable and some are even dangerous. Very little is the way it was when we were young.
Still, this past weekend 50 of my high school friends gathered on a Florida beach to celebrate a shared milestone birthday. Former classmates traveled from Texas, Colorado, Massachusetts, Illinois . . . and of course, every corner of Florida, to be together. It was important. Continue reading Sometimes You CAN Go Home Again
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